Nah it's not. I can see how someone would want to normalise such a shitty event to deal with it but the fathers I know and myself have been much much more involved and supportive than our fathers were
You realize nurses have training and read literature in their specialties (and do research themselves)? “L&D nurses will tell you” doesn’t just mean based on personal experiences (though that is undoubtedly part of it).
A lot of the nurses I’m friends with on Facebook did their own research and kept posting about how Covid was fake and masks were genocide… not sure if I trust their research skills.
What do you think youre proving by posting this? 86% attending the birth of their infant seems very very high, you'd probably see less consistent attendance for almost any event where they're not legally required to be there, and maybe even some where they are lol.
Then the second part, them feeling unwelcome or "in the way" is pretty understandable. Husbands can only do so much, it's the wife giving birth that is the main event, and shes the only one that can push that baby out. If the husband has done everything he can, assuming he's not medically trained to actually deliver the baby, then how could he not feel "in the way" when his wife is going through that? That of course doesn't justify leaving, but I can understand not wanting to be in the way of the trained professionals who are trying to get your beloved partner through such a traumatic event.
I’m proving that this has been studied and not just gut feeling of nurses. That said, would consider 14% of the population “common.” That’s a lot of people!
About the same percent of people are left handed, would you consider that common?
Also I don't see it stated anywhere why the 14% of husbands weren't present, there are countless reasons, valid or otherwise, why someone wouldnt be able to attend. Not to excuse all of them, but if lets say the husband was in a car accident and was severely injured or even killed, that would count as not being present for the birth. You seem to be assuming all of that 14% were just not interested or didn't want to be there.
That is 14% of all hospital births, probably pretty close to the % where the couple were never or are no longer together. 86% means that the ratio of men attending the birth of their children vs those who don't is 6:1 so no it's not "common", it's "common" that they DO show up, statistically, its RARE that they don't.
I mean all three of these seem like they're asking men about their feeling, emotions, thoughts, and expectations during birth. The image you posted says we feel unwelcome. Not that they are neglecting partners
My “argument” was only that this is something that has been studied and not purely the anecdotal observation of RNs. That is clearly true. I don’t have any strong position on the specifics.
Conclusion This study provides qualitative evidence that birth marked the beginning of fatherhood for these men. A father’s presence is now an indelible part of childbirth, and midwives can use their presence to help them to empower their partners to give birth in the best way they can.
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u/tiorzol Apr 24 '26
Nah it's not. I can see how someone would want to normalise such a shitty event to deal with it but the fathers I know and myself have been much much more involved and supportive than our fathers were