I'm gonna guess that she's happily startled because, for example, mine hit his weed pen outside every 15 minutes and fell asleep on the couch and never once came near me. I think that my experience (or smth similar) is pretty common.
Edit: Hi, I'm an actually human person and was the first to comment on this. I'm not trying to start a damn war of the roses, and apparently this is NOT the correct answer (see the next comment below mine). Just popped in with my stupid, obviously incorrect thought about what this could mean. So chill with calling me a stupid whore.
Nah it's not. I can see how someone would want to normalise such a shitty event to deal with it but the fathers I know and myself have been much much more involved and supportive than our fathers were
Yup, if they married and had a child with a man like this, you can't really expect the people they surround themselves with to be vastly different. So they'd think it's normal to be like this.
The self-formed bubble is such a common perception-distorting issue. It's the same with "Why aren't there any good guys, all the guys I date are assholes." or "Why aren't there any good women? All the women I date just want my money.".
Well, if you keep dating a specific type of person, you will end up dating that specifict type of person.
Huh. I have a husband and a few close girl friends... add in my dad and brother. That actually makes me feel weirdly good about myself. I like this. Might be analyzing myself today.
Used to have a coworker that demanded dating advice from me, because I lucked out and found a great partner.
I don't consider myself an expert when someone just spoke to me on the bus and we hit it off, but I decided to ask my coworker a few questions - turns out she (lesbian) was get REAL tired of the drama... but allll her attempts to find people were at the club.
And I'm just like... I am not a lesbian, I have no idea where you can go looking for women, but maybe stop looking at the club if you're tired of drama. The club is FOR drama, you need to go find a queer cafe or something.
The honest answer about how to find a good partner is that a lot of it is just luck. Like yeah, you can potentially swing your luck by changing your dating strategy(stop picking up people at the club), but that is hardly anywhere close to guarantee that a good partner will surface because you joined your library book club instead of the night club.
Oh yeah - but I do think that if you keep getting a certain result, you should change your method. If EVERYONE you meet at the club has too much drama, stop checking out people at the club. At least take a break on it.
My SIL. And every dude she’s brought around or mentioned, my wife and I have told her “honey he ain’t the one”. She won’t listen. Same with her job. They are clearly using you and stinging you along, see how your responsibilities and expectations keep going up but your pay doesn’t? No we just don’t understand the dynamic. Mmmk you do you.
When my wife delivered our son I was terrified. The only way I can really "help" is by being there and being as supportive as I can be. So I did exactly that.
The worst thing that happened during the delivery was actually the doctor. I was waiting on the after room while they prepped my wife for the C-section, and the doctor walks up and says " so your the one whose responsible for this?". Then when she's elbows deep getting out son out she heavily implied my wife was asleep when our son was conceived. I called her our right there for it, the nurses, and other professionals there agreed. She is now being sued and reviewed for unprofessional conduct.
I don't understand men that need to setup their Xbox or go vape during the delivery. You have one job boys. Be there for your ladies.
My husband has a coworker that would often bitch about girls for being expensive/high maintenance/shallow, but now that man is dating a rich, shallow Miami girl. So the exact kind of person he spent time bitching to my husband about, saying all girls suck, is now the person he’s choosing to probably marry 🙃 I’m already predicting the divorce lmao.
If you don’t want to be in a relationship where someone prioritizes looks and spending money to achieve a certain appearance, don’t go after those people lol and if that stuff is important to you, don’t bitch about having to spend all that money keeping up. But also tired of hearing these guys saying all girls suck and have expensive habits when they are the ones continuing to swipe on these girls and get the same response everytime (goes both ways too, back when I was on dating apps, if I swiped right on a douchy looking guy who said they wanted something casual, I wouldn’t expect a relationship out of that)
I mean, when it comes to your dating experiences, you are the common denominator, so if *all* your partners have been awful, unless you are just starting out, then that isn't a terrible reflection on them.
Right. My ex was 17 when our daughter was born. My family thought he was a loser (we were alt/punk kids) but he was amazing during my pregnancy, the birth, and has always been an incredible devoted father. Better than a lot of men twice his age tbh
I'm glad. I'm a step father of three, and their actual father barely ever showed up, avoided payments, all that. He died a few years ago. The kids ask me about him because I used to work with him and i knew him better than they did. I never liked the guy, and the best thing he did for his family was die. I don't tell them that, but I can't avoid the truths of him not being there and doing drugs and generally being a piece of shit.
The kids seem to be doing pretty well, but depression is a problem. I also deal with depression and I'm not sure how to help them sometimes
Bio mom was a negligent idiot who was bent on turning her daughter against her father and instilling dangerous and deadly sociopathic behaviors in her. Complained constantly about having to be a mother. She bailed on her the second she questioned her about ONE THING.
It’s been hell but kiddo is coming out the other side. She loves her dad now and has stopped acting out for the last couple of months. It looks like it’s going to stick.
It’s been so hard not to say anything about her mother other than she just doesn’t understand why she’s wrong for what she’s done and most likely won’t. That I wish it wasn’t how it is for either of them but it’s not kiddo’s fault and I won’t stop her but she doesn’t have to subject herself to her mother and that’s okay.
It’s been so hard keeping my Mr Roger’s face on when kiddo has done everything in her power to hurt me (and I was abused as a kid and by my ex). The depression is real and I’ve been really struggling with everything finally being good. I have a ton of pent up anger and my boyfriend (the dad) is struggling to deal with/help me through it.
I know, it makes no sense. I keep telling myself if I can just hold it together it’s going to okay. It will be. I know it.
She’ll start therapy soon. She’s ready to try again. I hope she gets a good one.
Basically, I am saying that you’ve got this! And they’ve got it too!
Just keep trying to do what you know is best because it is. It just takes time. So much time.
Life is hard. I remember being so fucked up as a kid because of decisions my parents made and who they were and how they treated me. I had an epiphany sometime after I had my children that just… solved it. I was the product of two people who had absolutely no business breeding and didn’t have the tools to try to raise a human being. It wasn’t personal. It’s not because I wasn’t good enough. It actually had nothing to do with me. I could’ve been the most perfect child on the face of the earth. They lacked the ability to see it. So… had nothing to do with me. That was a THEY problem, not a me problem. Been fine since that realization lol. And also, DON’T BE LIKE THEM because my kids deserve the best. I think… you should parent kids based on the kind of parent they DESERVE (the best) and not based on your own impulses, irritations, issues, etc. Self control.
I think this is directly related to how millenials were patented, and also the fact that most millenials view having children as an active choice they made rather than a standard milestone of life and marriage. I personally don't want kids, but I love seeing involved dads.
Interestingly, that same study shows that millennial moms are ALSO more involved. I can’t imagine being less involved than I am. What was wrong with previous gens?
Pr9bably the best judges but don't tell my parents that lol. Nurses can project how they want to be treated onto other couples. My mom was very much "get this thing out of me and take the baby" but the nurses boxed my dad out and kept trying to force my mom to take it. They'd tell you my dad was being pushy despite him trying to do exactly what my mom said she needed him to do. Not everyone wants the same kind of support and nurses can be super judgemental.
They absolutely are. It’s like they don’t want the father anywhere around even when the father is doing everything right and doing exactly what the mother needs. I understand they probably see a lot of shitty fathers but also if wasn’t assertive they wouldn’t have let me be involved at all, and then they would have trashed me for not being involved.
I’m still pissed off that they tried to keep me from carrying my own child out of the hospital (in a car seat), when they were discharged, and insisted that my wife had to carry the seat in her lap, where it was sitting directly on a fresh c-section incision.
Based on previous experience my mom wanted my dad to immediately take the baby while she recovered. He was trying to support her by doing so but for whatever reason the nurses didn't let him and kept trying to give the baby to my mom. They basically had to yell at the nurses because they crowded my mom, boxing my dad out. Despite then doing the opposite of what my mom wanted/needed, I'm sure they tell the story of my dad being overbearing instead of realizing he was doing what my mom said she needed.
I can tell you why they were trying to give baby to mom at least. Protocol is baby goes to mom immediately while she recovers, then the baby goes to dad while they check mom. Unless there's a medical emergency that requires immediate care to either mom or baby (like my son's birth where my partner had some blood loss from a torn uterus). They were basically defaulting to their standard pattern and either didnt hear or didnt understand your mom (or were just bad nurses, they do exist).
Similar happened to my dad with me. The catholic nurses at this hospital were so cruel to my mom because I wouldn’t latch breastfeeding that she started sobbing begging for them to give me a bottle. my poor ex military dad had to use his scary voice in order for them to listen to her and he was made out to be pushy and demanding when he was completely compliant until they refused to help my exhausted mother.
That’s where you see the meme about women complaining about truly bad partners and than one lady goes “I guess him not taking the trash out ain’t that bad” than again comparison is the thief of joy they say
Yeah. Or they desperately try to find other things wrong with the SO of other people.
Yeah he makes 6 figures, dances flamenco, went to an elite university and treats her extremely well - but I am sure he is just a dull, boring unmanly guy…
It's funny, he's actually the shittiest person I know. My family is spectacular. But when you have kids and you're brainwashed, the massive amount of guilt for being selfish for leaving is like a ball and chain. Been together 10 years and has never proposed marriage. I even bought him a house. I know it's not normal. I'm spiraling here lol
This reminds me of the guy that got roasted on Reddit because all of his comic book characters had very poorly drawn feet. He got mad and said that was what feet looked like. People in the comments demanded a picture of the guy's feet. Turns out he and his family had a rare genetic disorder that made their feet look weird.
62 million hits on the rape academy sight in February alone means more men than you're acting like are total fucking monsters. "Who she chooses to surround herself with" gtfo you don't know the situation at all.
I think childbirth also brings a lot of the narc behaviors to the surface more dramatically. Before the kid, the partner was the default focus, no real competition. Once the kid is born it becomes impossible for the partner the be the focus with feedings, diaper changes etc, requiring more overt/drastic demands and manipulation.
Y'all. SHE NEVER SAID IT WAS NORMAL. It is common. If there are enough people like this that it's easy to surround yourself with only people with the same experience, then it is common. That doesn't make it normal.
Not always true. My grandma is a wonderful woman, her bf/fiancé was great. As soon as he became “husband” he was fucking awful. Wasn’t even there for my dad’s birth. People change
Idk, I’m married to a pretty stellar person. I’ve always had relationships where respect and joint happiness came first (I’ve had duds, ofc) but a lot of my friends have relationships that I would absolutely never ever tolerate a fraction of the bs from.
We all talk intimately about issues and successes… hasn’t change them being in shitty relationships.
Right, but that rationale can also apply to the man you replied to. He and his friends are good husbands and fathers, so he thinks there aren't that many crummy guys out there.
The worst of us pretend to be good people while raping children and other not-so-great activities, and the other shit people clap them on the back and say they’re good people.
My still squashed hand remembers 🤝 it's surprising how being unsupportive is normalised. What a terrifying and beautiful experience to share with a partner. Horrifying. I'm sure guillermo del toro directed my wife's birth.
I went in with the notion of "this isn't about me, let's get through this in one piece", we managed that and I'll be eternally grateful to the majority of midwives that got us to the finish line.
Well, by this logic they are doing the same thing. The person you replied to is agreeing that it’s NOT common/normal because everyone THEY see does the opposite of original commenter. So who’s to say which one is common/normal? Having met people, I’d bet that more people lean towards the original commenters description, even though it’s about 50/50 with the people I know
One of my favorite questions to ask people - what is something you thought was normal until you realized it wasn’t. One of my teachers told me that her grandparents (that raised her) would come tie her into bed before sleeping (their explanation was believing it would stop her from falling out of bed). Later in her childhood she went to a friend’s house for a sleepover and asked when they were going to get tied down and apparently it caused quite the shock for everyone and explanations were required. She laughs as it’s a fond memory, but that was one that stood out for sure. I have asked many people and always get an interesting story.
I think that RN the few paradigm-shifters legit think they're a majority in some areas because the old guard know their stance isn't going to be received as 'just how it is' anymore so they keep quiet - except in DEI-backlash areas where the far right has gained momentum and a loud annoying stupid voice.
It’s incredibly normal if you ask L&D nurses. It’s not an issue of someone seeing themselves as the standard. It’s an issue of men being defensive of shitty men because they think it reflects poorly on themselves. Which should tell you something.
Joke's on you : my father was so involved that he fainted in the delivery room, hit his head on the chair he had been waiting on and was evacuated by a nurse directly to neurology while my mom had her baby.
So... he wasn't really that supportive at that point, but he stayed the night at the hospital, at least.
Hey, your dad gave his best. Birth is a monumental task and as a father you feel like a helpless bystander that is watching his wife perform a fucking miracle while screaming in pain or begging for help while all you can do is hold her hand and tell her she's doing great while there's excrement and blood involved.
Your dad is LEAGUES ahead of a guy that just leaves to smoke weed and fall asleep.
You just described the birth of my first child in perfect detail. I was NOT ready for that much poop and trauma. All I can remember is poop and trauma. I thought my wife was going to die, then I thought our unborn child was going to die, then they put us all to sleep for a rest (even me!), only to wake up and get right back to the poop and trauma.
I absolutely can not believe that we went and did it a second time. I am now proudly desexed.
Lmao my husband also thought everyone involved was dying. Surely seems like a thing that should kill you more often. I maintain…that is NOT supposed to fit through down there and for those reasons I am one and done
I guess my question as a woman is… what did you expect? It wasn’t really too shocking for me because I had been warned my whole life how horrible it would be and that I could die. But men seem so surprised as if we don’t have tons of media of women screaming in pain during labour, lol. Like, did y’all think we were just being dramatic and dying cause we felt like it??
Everyone reacts to stress differently. He mentioned trauma a few times. Many births are a breeze, and many are way more traumatic then you can really prepare for, and in between. As a father I went through two. One was 48 hours of hell where the baby and mom almost died while the second was a breeze. We watched birth videos and did all the classes but nothing could have prepared us for the first. I just happen to be a person that disassociate and gets to work during traumatic situations. Many people are not like this though and I am not sure we should blame them when they are doing their best.
My wife picked stupid prenatal classes for us and they gave us the expression that if the mother is just relaxed and wishes hard enough and approaches this as a self-determined, independent boss girl who is totally in touch with her feelings that this will be a breeze.
Nobody mentioned that phrases like "please, please, help me, make it stop, i can't anymore" will be said or that the entire birth will be more like a medical procedure than a harmonic hippy walk in the park.
Literally nobody told us about how hard it was going to be. It was like everyone around us, medical professionals, midwives, friends, parents were all gaslighting us and pretending that a birth is a total happy place.
In all fairness, I can see there being a difference between being aware of everything involved in childbirth, versus actually witnessing your partner's gooch rip in two first hand.
I'm well aware of that, it's something that's passed downbfrom father to son in the family and the day my turn arrived I warned the nurses that something like that could happen.
They were very understanding and put up a screen to conceal the business end of things and everything went well. My hands were crushed by my wife, as is tradition and they did clean up the baby a bit before handing it back to us.
I remember when my wife gave birth, I turned around and went to hug my MIL crying and the nurses yelled at me “Come back you get to cut the chord” so I hurried did that and wanted to get out of the nurses way. I kept staring toward our son when thy moved him over to the separate baby bed thing with the light on it, I looked back towards my wife when they wheeled the placenta past me and I remember crying again and saying, “is that important? Does that need to go back in my wife” and just sliding down into the chair beside me.
My sons are 22 & 24 and I can still remember the smell of all the blood. So strong, like iron & pennies, that in addition to all that’s going on in the moment is a wild combination.
Dad fainting in the delivery room is apparently very common. When my wife was getting prepped for her emergency c-section for our first, multiple nurses kept checking with me to see if I was ok and needed anything. I was like, no, how about focusing your attention on the person who's screaming in pain and frustration and about to have another human being ripped forcibly from her giblets (I said it nicer than that). When all was said and done they explained that they were just making sure I didn't become a liability in there.
My husband was remarkably cool about the fact that he saw my torso cut open, my organs removed, and our daughter pulled out blue because she had the cord wrapped around her neck and leg. (She was fine as soon as they unwrapped her.) I lost a ton of blood with her and my other two, both of whom were also c-sections because apparently after that my uterus couldn’t be trusted not to rupture in a natural birth because I had bad fibroids. Whenever I would talk about anything that I thought could be gross or off-putting about my body to him, he would remind me that he’s seen my insides pulled out and it really didn’t phase him. Now me? I couldn’t handle looking at my own incision without getting woozy, let alone handling the kids hurting themselves when blood was involved. Luckily, there have only been maybe two or three incidents in the 21 years since we had our oldest that he’s had to handle, and he’s been home for all of them. I would have understood if he had been a fainter, but I am super grateful that he isn’t.
Oh lord. My husband knows me well enough to have not said anything like that to me, because I would have probably had to have been revived right there on the table.
Haha yeah, I definitely saw parts of my wife I never expected to. I distinctly recall handing my son to the nurse after holding him the first time, turning around, and seeing the doctor gently scrubbing some organ with the same vigor and care you'd use to polish, say, a brass doorknob. We managed to avoid the blue baby part though.
big facts. i was there for every second doing all i could do to support. held hands until she crushed mine. water and cold compresses. helped her into new birthing positions. mirrored breathing. took photos whenever appropriate… and THEEN i hit the weed pen. after the dude showed up
One of the greatest pleasures in my life is taking my boy to the park. That level of joy in mere existence is something we get so far away from in adult life
Im of course referring to the tendency of middle eastern men in particular to refuse to change diapers of small children at all or to take paternity leave even back when that peternity leave is lost if not used by the father.
Im of course referring to the tendency of middle eastern men in particular
To clarify, those men are specifically first-generation or second-generation immigrants who buy into a hypermasculine traditionalist culture. You'd see the same behaviour from an American evangelical, or a Chinese Confucianist. Be careful not to miss the forest for the trees.
Lmfao such bigotry of low expectations. As if “well it’s their culture” would ever be an expectable excuse for the same behavior from an American evangelical.
To be fair we dont have alot of evangelical american Christians or Chinese confucianists in Sweden, so il not sure why someone from sweden would ever compare themselves to them as opposed to comparing themselves to middle eastern men, which makes up a large percentage of our actual population
Of course there are reasons that Mideastern immigrants are not dads who go sharesies on child rearing; of course it has to do with culture; of course there are other cultures that are this way. You added nothing to the post.
I looked it up and 4.5% of the Swedish population is from the Middle East, maybe I misunderstood something but doesn't it seem a little odd for nurses to randomly comment on 4.5% of the population?
"immigrants" or "immigrants from the Middle East"? 20% would refer to all children born to all immigrants. This includes, for an example, white Americans who came to Sweden just as much as it includes people from the Middle East.
... At least until they pick up marathon running, cross-country skiiing or other hobby that conventionally takes them out of the house for days at a time.
if the moms come out they bring an army and all huddle together and chat for an hour and the kids just take over the park, lol. but usually its just 3 or 4 dads.
I think it's more that, when you work in that kinda field, you see so many examples of the worst kinda person. Think retail and customer service - not every customer is awful, but when you're serving all day and the vast majority of people are neutral at best or horrific at worst, it's a pleasant surprise when you serve someone who is genuinely lovely.
Plus our brain will focus on the bad while forgetting the good.
Like when you are driving you won't remember all the drivers who let you swerve infront of them or drove normally.
But you will remember that 1 driver who drove like an asshole and thats the one you will tell everyone about how people suck at driving and how dumb people are.
People are so quick to shit on dads. Whenever I’m out and about with the girls, some old lady has to say “oh, giving mom a break?” Bitch this is everyday. I cook 99% of the meals and lug these kids everywhere.
Yeah my husband massaged me and got me drinks and snacks and knew beforehand anytime I was going to vomit and got a receptacle and fanned me/put cool cloths on my face and neck and also was my dj who took requests and still felt like he didn't do enough! And both my labors were over night and more than 12 hours long at the hospital
Thankfully, my husband was engaged and was with me the whole time - even the 28 hour labor. Every prenatal appointment, labor, I didn’t change a diaper for the first week. He was awesome
As recently as the 1980s, many hospitals actively tried to keep men out of deliveries. So to be fair to all the dads who weren't there for the delivery, it's a relatively new thing (in modern times) for a man to be there.
I was there for all four of mine. Could have gone my whole life not seeing that. I think those guys were on to something. (I wouldn't change it for anything.)
Nurse here - based on the occasions I'd get floated to the L&D unit to assist, the only thing L&D nurses love more than babies is making outrageously sexist jokes at the nurse's station. You'd think every man who'd ever impregnated a woman was literally Satan.
Granted, I haven't worked in bedside care in like 10 years, so maybe the current generation is less shitty.
My Grandparents had to force my dad to go into the room, just for him to pass out anyways.
My husband, while an amazing person, got pushed out of the way with our first as nurses needed to get to me (my BP shot up) and with our second he was helpfully unhelpful (the room was so hot because the hospital AC was struggling due to the heatwave at the time).
Exactly. I am so tired of men just casually being shit upon like it’s not big deal. Yes there are dads like that but there are supportive ones too. I am a dad and know other fathers. All of them were there and in the moment.
it is. I stayed with my wife for 14 hours until the doctor finally called a c-section at 3 AM. you gotta be there emotionally and physically for your partner. it's not about you at that moment.
I didn’t leave the room the entire time. I quit smoking cigarettes because there was no way in hell anything was going to stop me from seeing my child be born. I’m now over 1600 days smoke free and my child is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me.
Healthcare professional here. In our public system, it’s a rule of thirds I would say. 1/3 are a lovely couple, husband is v supportive, aware and engaged, attentive; 1/3 seem disengaged/not really bothered or part of conversation (and honestly sometimes those are the ones that cry and you’ve misjudged completely that they’re “not engaged”) and the final 1/3… hoo boy. Either not there, which is probably best for all, or absolutely fucking useless. Drunk. Or “cracking jokes” like an ahole.
It’s great you’re an involved dad and I do think even in the last 10 years it’s gotten a lot better, it’s more expected dads are involved and they are made feel welcome (cos I accept that’s a big issue and problem sometimes) but it’s certainly not abnormal to see bad treatment of/indifference towards delivering mothers by their spouses.
Yes. I’m sorry to the original commenter for thinking this is normal 😭 my fiance literally didn’t stop holding my hand & coaching me until the doctor took me to the O.R - then resumed doing so once he was allowed inside.
I was in the room for both. Holding her legs open with the nurse when the epidural kicked in and they were numb. Stayed each night, as well. To the woman above whose "partner" dipped when the challenging moments arrived - I am sorry, but dude is a bitch.
Every time I see stuff like this. I just remember seeing my grandpa and a bunch of my great uncles all tear up and get very emotional when they thought about how they weren't allowed to be at some of their children's births.
No men not wanting to be at their children's birth isn't normal or typical.
I don't know about my dad in that time, but I was there feeding my wife ice chips, holding her leg and cutting the cord for both kids. A few other fathers had similar experience and were very active in the delivery process.
I see stuff now of guys playing video games and crap. It blows my mind you can be so absent and disconnected during delivery. I hope it's just for the meme picture and not real, but sadly I know it's real.
I was literally supportive - at one point the midwife had me standing on a stepladder, arms under my wife's armpits, holding her up in a squatting position to take the weight off her legs.
I think the fact that you’re getting awards and standing ovations for just being an involved parent goes to show how low the bar really is for dads. Crazy that you would put a woman down for her birth experience and pat yourself on the back for not being a piece of shit at the same time.
Being more involved than boomer dads is a low bar.
That said, being physically present is very different than being emotionally supportive. My husband was physically present and is a great, involved father. But as a birth partner? He was out of his depth and was pretty much frozen the whole time.
I'm not saying all men are like that, but being an involved father does not mean you'll also be an assertively encouraging birth partner.
Actually, you'd be surprised. When I was there for the birth of my firstborn, there were a dozen other women who didnt have husbands there. I only saw the other guys show up on the day of delivery; and many the day after. Nurses were telling me how sweet it was to see me there actually supporting my wife. I helped the nurses do everything in her room as well.
I brought a fruit tray and handed it out to everyone in the room. …. I also held the flashlight during the stitches, but that part is much less cute to share in normal conversation.
Yeah we gotta stop letting these chuds set the standard for men. If anyone in my family or friend group tried pulling that shit it wouldn’t last long. To the woman who posted the og comment, you deserve better and dont you let that little boy teach your children what it means to be a man. Men don’t run away to hit their little weed binky while their wife is literally giving birth.
Never got the opportunity to have kids, but I let out a gasp when I read that comment. That is not common at all with the men I know and associate with.
13.1k
u/BeatnikBun Apr 24 '26 edited Apr 24 '26
I'm gonna guess that she's happily startled because, for example, mine hit his weed pen outside every 15 minutes and fell asleep on the couch and never once came near me. I think that my experience (or smth similar) is pretty common.
Edit: Hi, I'm an actually human person and was the first to comment on this. I'm not trying to start a damn war of the roses, and apparently this is NOT the correct answer (see the next comment below mine). Just popped in with my stupid, obviously incorrect thought about what this could mean. So chill with calling me a stupid whore.