I (M) remember my overnight stay after delivery, I tried to soothe the baby when it awoke and it wasn’t feeding time, and woke every time the nurses came in i was there to help mom during feedings. We slept in fits, they wake mom every 4 hours to encourage feeding.
I remember the nurse’s told me that most dads don’t help, don’t get involved, and leave everything to the mom.
We were jut recovering from a brutal birth so I was eagerly interested in both baby and mom’s health and recovery but the stories the nurses told me were shocking.
“Helping out” is kinda the problem. It’s not seen as an obligation but rather that the mother is the default parent and the father is a saint if he helps out with his own child! It’s a why there’s so many videos of women begging their partner to “babysit” while they take a shower weeks after birth. I think it’s also probably part of the reason women aren’t having as many kids. We need a cultural shift, even more extreme than what is already occurring.
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u/Upstairs-Hedgehog575 Apr 24 '26
Is it? That sounds horrendous.