I'm guessing this is the actual answer. It's funny how split people are about this. People think it's either that men are deadbeats usually, or men can't seem to say the right thing in a situation like that.
I hope it’s not casting shade for a guy saying “you got this”, though I realize it may well be. Childbirth is a super awkward, actually genuinely terrifying, situation that usually lasts a few hours. The smoothest & most well-meaning and informed guy in the world is going to say something sub-optimal by the end.
It’s less that it’s shady and more that when you’re in excruciating pain, you aren’t thinking straight, and really well-meaning encouragement can feel condescending and be kind of enraging. Not a rational response at all but it’s kind of hard to be rational when you feel like you’re being ripped apart and the man who caused it and has no idea what you’re feeling is recycling cliches because he (understandably) has no idea how to help. Part of accompanying anyone experiencing that kind of agony (for anything, not just childbirth) is understanding that pain causes people to lash out, and you will probably end up being one of the targets, and you shouldn’t take it personally.
You should've seen the original YT comments, (its probably still up now that h think about it) they were chock full of people in this situation straight up reveling in how cruel they were during their agony.
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u/appleparkfive Apr 24 '26
I'm guessing this is the actual answer. It's funny how split people are about this. People think it's either that men are deadbeats usually, or men can't seem to say the right thing in a situation like that.